Giant Padded Sumo Suits

What could be more fun than giant padded Sumo Suits?

Jodi and Neal decided to include a pair along with a padded ring at their wedding reception in Monterrey. As I ate and mingled my way through the evening, I was eyeing the sumo suits, waiting for the right moment to give them a go. When that moment came hilarity ensued.

My first opponent was Darin. He beat me with surgical precision in a 2 to 3 bout in less than five minutes. His technique was perfect. He said it was the first time he had ever donned a giant padded sumo suit, but I have my suspicions. After Darin, I tried to find an easy opponent to redeem myself with a victory. Anthony, who came all the way from Australia, was jet lagged and moderately intoxicated, a sure win I thought - Not so! He proceeded kick my ass, 2 out of 3 again. Here are two videos Darin took with his cell phone. Sorry for the poor quality, but they are hilarious.

Allow me to narrate. In the video above, notice how Anthony dodged my attack perfectly with a 180 degree roll and then followed with a full body slam including another 180 degree roll. Well done sir, well done... In the next video I tried changing my technique to short burst attacks. Anthony skillfully rebuked my attacks as he insidiously drew me to the edge of the ring for the take down. The video doesn't show it but he followed with another lung crushing body slam.

Also, notice the heroic father snatching his daughter out of harm's way at the last minute in the lower right hand side of the screen. She would have faced certain death, being crushed by my giant-padded-sumo-suit-laden body hurdling towards her.

I learned a lot from my giant padded sumo suit experience. Overconfidence and arrogance were my down fall, yet another disturbing parallel to the Bush Administration (see this post). I underestimated my skilled and intoxicated opponents and was humiliated as a result. I've been running hourly searches of Craigslist all over the country in hopes of finding a cheap pair. If I find a pair, I'll buy them and practice for hours everyday in hopes of one day redeeming my honor...

Oh and by the way, CONGRATULATIONS Jodi and Neal! I wish you the best in your future together.